Am I a bully? Do you believe that the bullying kid is the tough kid who is physically threatening and pushing everyone around? Think again…. It could be pretty girl, the quiet kid, the joker, or YOU? ….
The simple fact is that there are many more kids who are bullied and very few who are aware and admit to doing the bullying.
Sure, it probably isn’t you. But my research has shown that there are some kids who simply don’t realise the impact their actions have… Here I talk about the more subtle art of bullying – the teasing and having some “harmless” fun, effectively any action directed at kids who struggle to defend themselves.
So, ask yourself these questions:
- Do I make (gentle) fun of some kids, for any reason?
- Are there some kids that avoid me at school?
- Do I have strong bossy streak?
- Am I quick to dismiss other kids, with mean face or hand gestures?
- Do I like to manipulate to get my way?
- Am I part of a strong clique?
- Do I enjoy telling gossip and rumours?
If you take a moment to reflect honestly on these questions, you will see that almost all of us are guilty at some point of this behaviour. But if you recognise repeated behaviour, it is more than possible that you are perceived as a bully by those around you.
Sure, you may not have any bad intention, and you may not be aware that your behaviour is upsetting other kids, but here is the deal: You probably are upsetting the kids you are dealing with much more than you realise.
So, what options that you have:
- Do the opposite and be actively nice to the kids you may have upset
- Ask them if your behaviour bothers them, and listen to them
- Apologise if necessary
- Simply stop and leave other kids alone, unless you want to be their friend
If we consider the impact of our behaviour a little more, we may avoid some negative impact at the kids around us.
Remember, kind is cool….